୨୧ maplebear ♡₊

୨୧ diary


07.08.2024



dear diary,

i know i haven't updated this diary in many months, and the last update although written in april, talked about events from november/23! a lot has happened between those dates, lots of trips, birthdays, coffees with friends, life changes. i decided to write today to register how i'm feeling and what's going on - something i think will be interesting to read back, personally.

i have less than a month here in belgium now. for the time being, there are no plans to come back to live here, only to visit (hopefully!), and that makes me sad. i've been sad for months, it's not like this was a sudden decision, we've known since february!! but i liked pretending it wasn't going to happen... now that it's so close, i'm still sad, yes, but i'm starting to get excited about some of the things i expect from this new chapter. i like thinking about how our new home will be, what kind of furniture i'll get, new daily routines, maybe a chance to become my dream self?

with all this change, i've been journaling a lot but not really putting my feelings and thoughts anywhere besides the paper. i think it helped me accept it and now i'm ok with talking about it. sorry for being mysterious but i prefer not saying where we are moving to yet! i have a thing about saying those things before they happen (like telling people when my flight somewhere is, i only ever say it or post it online after i'm already at my destination - is this common to do?)


other things that have been going on these past few months:


got to spend time with loved ones i'm the most grateful person in the room! i love that i'm able to see friends and family as often as i do, and not only that but to travel to nice places with them. i hope they know how much i love them.

got engaged on april 11th ♡ he got me a pink tulip bouquet and tickets to go spend four days in copenhagen. it was magical and i'm so grateful!

achieved my yearly reading goal as of today, i have read a total of 22 books! the goal was 20 - a increase from previous years, i was a bit doubtful of the number, since i do like to complete the goal but it is definitely not my reason to read books... anyway if you are curious you can check the list of books on my bookbug page, under 2024 reads.

i like my own company doing things alone always scared me. i've been pushing myself a little bit more outside my comfort zone with things that seem simple (i guess?) for others, but that i just could never do by myself. ended up finding out that i quite like my own company and don't mind what others might think of me.

morning pages started to journal a bit every morning, just to get things off my chest and to not get overwhelmed - i put down three goals for myself everyday, little things i know will help my anxiety but also not such big chores that i'll end up not doing. it's freeing!

lost nana in june, my little pug dog passed away. i miss her a lot and was shattered to not be able to be there with her in her last moments... just like last year when i lost my cat, i feel guilty and i don't think i'll ever mend the part of my heart that went with them.

made a new friend which makes me a bit sad since it's so close to me going away, but of course also very glad to know her! i'm sure, like my other friends here, i'll keep in touch and come visit. i also hope they all get to visit me in my new place too!


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11.04.2024



november 2023: london edition

(a bit of a late post, but time is meaningless) in november last year we went to london for a few days. our friends were here visiting and we decided to join them there - london is one of my favourite (if not the favourite) places in the world. the first time i was there, i was maybe 15 and i still remember the feeling. it was such a different atmosphere being there compared to my usual life at the time. last year it was the fourth time i visited, and i still feel the same as back then. in another life i must have lived there, because it really is not possible to describe (at least i cannot put into words), how much i love it. it is always different travelling with friends too - we visited places we wouldn't otherwise!


london favourites

here's some all-time and some recent favourites if you are ever there:

the mousetrap yes, i have watched this agatha christie's play twice instead of watching something new - that's how good it is. i would go a third time if possible too.
the british museum quite the obvious addition to the list, but it's obvious for a reason. we could spend a whole day there and not get tired of it (we are museum people). i think if i ever lived in london, i would visit the museum at least once a week.
daunt books i love a good bookstore and this one is so cosy! at least it was when i visited it for the first time last year. too bad i didn't have a lot of space in my luggage to carry more books with me.
seol+gold a jewelry store - i have a really nice relationship with them (they gifted me a couple pieces in the past), and when i told them i was going to be in london and wanted to come and see the store in person, they gifted me some more pretty things! i'm really grateful for it, and i wear them so so much.
the moomin shop !! does this need an explanation!? i love the moomins! the store is super cute and filled with many cute items to bring home - including books!
pizza pilgrims some of the best pizzas we ever had! it really is amazing and so cheap (specially compared to eating out prices in belgium)

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13.02.2024



新年快乐 。⋆୨୧˚

"what is growth? what is maturity? transforming wrong things into right things is growth; transforming wrong things into right and turn them perfect is maturity." this was my lunar new year card (hongbao 紅包) - of all twenty different messages, this was the one i got. i'm still thinking about what it means exactly and how i can put it into practice. i'm really enjoying being part of the tao study group (not taoism), my heart feels so light after being with them!

this is my second year participating in the lunar new year festivities. it was three days filled with traditional ceremonies, good food, fun and games! i hope i can participate in the years to come too.

it is very interesting for me how this really is making me feel like a new year started (again), since this week i will return to belgium, to what i call my home away from home, to my boyfriend, our things, our friends and the daily routine i adore. i cannot wait to get back into it - and at the same time i want to enjoy this little time left to do everything i can and need too. this will be a year full of changes (something i never liked, and that has caused me great anxiety and sadness), but i am trying my best to refrain from thinking about everything i cannot control and, instead, focus on the now. now i am in my room writing this post. i hear my brother coming home from the cinema, the fan noise, and the clickity sound of the keyboard as i type. i feel my body tired and a bit sore after a bad night's sleep, and i'm a bit thirsty. i smell the popcorn my little brother made for himself. after this i will get a glass of water, lay on my bed and read an agatha christie's shortstory before turning off the lights to sleep. i wish you all a great day or night ˖ ࣪‧₊˚⋆✩٩(ˊᗜˋ*)و ✩

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31.12.2023



new year thoughts

i was feeling down the other day and started writing this post - but i have now deleted it and restarted it, for i do not want to finish this year with negative thoughts. instead of thinking about everything that i will miss and the things i did not want to let go of, but will have to, i want to focus on the things that make me excited for 2024.
yesterday i made my annual moodboard for the new year, and i filled it with everything i want to accomplish! i love having it as my desktop wallpaper, and this time i even made a phone wallpaper version. so let's get into my NY resolutions:

1. be more active and mindful of my body - of what i eat and drink, how i feel, and try to feel a little better everyday. i want to be healthier and feel comfortable and confident in myself. take more time for not only exercises, but for taking care of my skin, my hair, my mind. (also i need to get back into taking my vitamins!)

2. travel as much as possible. enjoy new places, new people, and new experiences. as i'm also moving to a different country next year, i want to stop being sad about it and try to focus on the things that make me excited for it. this does not mean i am not sad about it anymore, but just a change of focus.

3. keep reading a lot. this year i have read 24 books, and i loved it. i also want to get back into improving my language skills in Japanese and Italian! maybe i can get into a language course... that will be nice to get out of the house and meet new people.

4. make a new place feel like home. be positive about changes. nothing is fixed.

5. take more pictures! ask to have my picture taken too. memories are precious and i do not want to feel shy or embarrased about wanting them.

6. write more. i want to maybe keep a journal (be that in paper or online), just a simple thing to write down my thoughts and feelings. i think i keep things bottled for too long. that includes this blog - i want to keep updating it!

7. keep in touch with the people i love - i am not very good at messaging (or calling, yikes, i am not used to calling), and i want to change that!

this list is all from my (not online) planner/diary, and besides a few little personal things i removed, i am very happy to share with you all! i hope this new beginning will be good for all of us.

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10.09.2023



trip to sardegna

we just spent some days in sardegna, italy - it was such a lovely time! ꒰* ꈍ◡ꈍ ꒱ this time we did so many activities too. usually if it's just me and my boyfriend, we take things slow, walk around a lot, and don't really plan anything. but we went with friends and they are the opposite when traveling! which was a nice change of pace for us. everyday there would be stuff to do and see, and we even booked restaurants for dinner (we never do this!)
day one

on our first full day, we had brunch at our airbnb (big salad, bread, cheese and scrambled eggs! yummy) and then we went for a hike that was suppose to last 2 hours... we took 4 !!! (;▽;) it was a hike near spiaggia di notteri, climbing all the way up to a tower and then to the southest point of the island. there was an amazing view, but the cliff being so near us, and the wind so strong, i was a bit scared! ;; after we just went to the beach itself, which was nice. later we walk around villasimius and found a place to eat dinner (not the best... but everywhere else was full) and i bought a book! it's one i have read before, but this time i bought it in italian, so it will hopefully make me go back to study it harder haha (it's se una notte d'inverno un viaggiatore by italo calvino)
day two

we went to nora to visit the ancient city remains - super interesting and the archeologists were working on a part of the site as we visited! it was very interesting to see them digging in real life ✧٩(ˊωˋ*)و✧ and there was so many pretty mosaic tiled floorings... so inspiring! after that we went to the spiaggia di tuerredda to relax on the beach~
day three

we took this day to visit the city of cagliari! it's very pretty, we walked around to the bastione di saint remy which had a nice view of the city, and then palazzo regio which was lovely too! walking around a bit more we found the roman amphitheatre of cagliari - again, very pretty to look at, but it was not possible to visit the actual thing (although they had a ticket booth where you could pay to walk a bit closet to it? very odd and not worth it in my opinion!) at the end of the day, we stayed at the spiaggia di campulongu and watched the sunset. i think this was one of my favourite moments from the trip! ( ⁎ᵕᴗᵕ⁎ )❤︎

day four

guess what we did... yes... we visited some more ancient remains... this time we went to su nuraxi, a village from the mid-bronze age! it was actually quite fun. the guided tour made it better, too! and then we did a wine tasting tour (much more my style of traveling...) on the audarya winery. they even had a little farm with goats, chickens, ducks, donkeys and a pony! it was a shame that we only traveled with our hand luggage, so we couldn't buy the wine to bring home...
day five (last day!!)

boat tour day!! everyone was so excited for this, the boat would take us to three beaches only reachable by sea plus a cave! there was a problem thought... everyone (except my bf) got sea sick... (-﹏-。) just thinking about the movement of the waves... it makes me feel nauseous again... the first stop was the cave, which was very interesting!! the grotta del fico is a cave high on the mountains, and the guided tour was amazing (also it was such a relief to get out of the boat). we ended up going to only two beaches after that, because the third one was closed by the coast guard! the first beach we stayed for only 30 minutes, which was not enough for us to enjoy it - my bf was on the water, having fun, and we were sitting trying not to puke lol and the last beach we had 3 hours in! i went to the water but it was so incredibly violent that it was impossible to enjoy. the sea kept pushing and pulling you, the waves were big and crashed so hard on you! i almost lost my favourite hat...

let's talk food

now... sardegna was not very vegetarian friendly! (and if you are vegan, i think you should maybe meal prep...) but what i could eat, i did really enjoy. they had something called culurgiones (kind of like a ravioli, but with potatoes, cheese and mint filling) - that was really good! i had it a couple of times. the pizza there was just delicious, as you'd expect of italy! i think that's what i ate the most, as it was always the easiest and more widely available veggie option. but my favourite was a dessert called seada ٩(ˊᗜˋ*)و they are a fried dough filled with cheese and lemon peel, and topped with honey!! omg... i'd fly there again just to eat it again! and of course, i had my share of aperol spritz (yummy!!)

29.08.2023


getting this website together!!

i'm so excited to finally have a blog that has everything i wanted - previously i tried making a wordpress site, a squarespace, and lastly, a tumblr, but they all had the same issue: i wanted something i could CUSTOMIZE, make different pages, add images wherever i wanted... and that's just not possible on any of those (at least not for free and not with my coding skills *cough cough*
i've always been into blogging, but that faded away with the rise of social media, and i missed it so much! i wish everyone kept a blog still... come back guys i need blogs to read ! !

02.08.2023



✧ ˖ my current wishlist・゚

1. en route jewelry: the mixed metal ribbon earrings are just perfect for everyday, and the july ring is just calling my name with all the pretty colorful gems
2. boris bear: my miffy plushie needs a friend
3. yarn: not necessarily pink, just trying to find a cute and unique one to make a bag - i bought a cute pattern but never used it!
4. the frenchman's creek by daphne du maurier: i love her books, and after i found this perfect edition from folio society's… not a want anymore, but a NEED!
5. fresh flowers for the house. always.
6. buttons: i'm thinking of replacing some of my cardigan's boring buttons with cute ones - a simple way to renew clothes you already own!
7. a miffy tattoo: not exactly that image, but i'm thinking thoughts!!
8. ikea gursken: a practical wishlist item. i just need to replace the ugly bedside table i currently have with something more spacious!
9. denim dungarees: the ones i have are ripped at the knees and that's not my thing anymore (i'm cutting them and making them into short dungarees), so i want a pair of plain ones!
10. a good pair of straight leg denim pants: everyone should have one. i don't have one. you do the math.
11. boston birkenstocks: a recurrent wishlist item: i think if i wanted them for this long, it means i will really wear them!